I have a lot to say but the fucking reality is english is my language of emotion now. I get sad n depress n happy n horny in english. When i translates them to farsi, they are so fucking meaningless. So i dont write. I v been thinking about an english blog for long time now n my farsi is getting simpler n simpler everyday. I write like a elementary school kids and i used to write pretty well in farsi.
Last week i got so off when i hard farsi words when i had sex with someone. I stopped and ask him dont speak. And that s not me! Or i dont get to serious arguments about politics or anything serious in farsi as i use so many english words that makes it so shitty. I always hated when ppl do it and now i think stronger in english. I see myself funnier, more sarcastic and interesting person in english. I can talk about american politics n media for hrs or make everyone laugh or flirt better in english.
The saddest part is (beside forogh o hafez) i dont enjoy reading farsi books. My library is pretty rich when it comes to modern persian literature. But i dont read them. It makes me nervous when i read in farsi n thats so bloody sad. I may look snub or whatever, but my language has changed and i have to accept it. Even with all grammatical n spelling errors, it has changed